Skip to main content

The insecure writer's support group

The ground is important -- for several reasons.

Among them

Gravity makes no sense without it -- there's no mandate that science be logical so long as our scientists are the smartest smartypants on the planet, in which case "because I said so" is an acceptable explanation. The ground is important, because it's something to build on -- a starting point, a foundation.

I respect the ground, because it has on occasion fallen out from under me, and it's rather unsettling to watch your life in free-fall mode -- to see your accomplishments disintegrate in an instant or a decade in some cases. It all depends on how fast you're falling.

Most of us drop in slow motion. We'll catch a ledge or an up draft every once in a while and think "this is it!" But then we go on falling. Or do we? Is the "bottom" just a figment of our imaginations? Can we lay new ground wherever we choose?

Ask Alice

None of my friends growing up were impressed with Disney's Alice in Wonderland -- it disturbed them.

It seemed rather normal to me and comforting that someone in the world thought like I did -- that flowers and animals should talk, that all doors should lead somewhere silly, that people should grow and shrink with every meal, that falling down a rabbit hole should be an adventure as opposed to a nightmare.

But now that I'm a grown up I've forgotten all that Alice logic -- the curiosity that helped her through her journey.

The last few months might have been less harrowing if I'd asked myself more often -- what would Alice do? Would Alice surrender if something didn't go her way? Would Alice let her problems -- health crises, financial crises, marital crises, disorganized cupboard crises, any manner of crises -- stop her from being Alice?

No -- she wouldn't. She'd scarf down a magic mushroom grow 20-feet taller and take care of business -- "Oh poo, I'm not afraid of you. Why you're nothing but a ... (fill in the blank)."

Put your feet down

Life is full of ups and downs -- it has to be, otherwise it ceases to mean anything. I think perhaps the duration of a down period depends on your attitude and willingness to roll up your sleeves and say "F*** you, Life."

My excuses for not writing have run the gamut -- I don't have anything to say, I'm uninspired, I'm too depressed, I'm hungry, I didn't sleep well last night, I'm mad at my husband ... The truth is I've let my depression and anger about my circumstances stand in the way of my happiness.

Funny things are happening all around me.

My 3-year-old, Ashlyn, is stripping in the back yard -- "I anna pee in ta gwass! I anna pee, Papa!"

My 7-year-old, Lily, tells her dad at bedtime -- "You're a tiny action figure, Daddy."

I'd have a million things to write about if I stopped worrying so much about other people's expectations -- how many "likes" I'll get on Facebook, how many "hits" I'll get on my blog. None of that crap should matter -- it didn't when I started. NO. I need to get F*** over myself, put my feet on the ground, and start writing.

The Insecure Writer's Support Group: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!


  1. Great post - and keep up that determination to write. Determination and perseverance are the only things that'll get you to where you're going (even if it's a place you don't expect, a la Alice). I never really got Alice, but I loved Dorothy. It's all personal taste - so latch onto yours and write about it.
    Welcome to IWSG! :-)

    1. Yes -- Dorothy is FABULOUS. I would have never survived my childhood without her. Thanks for the encouragement. And thank you for reading.

  2. Hi there :)

    Just stopping by from the IWSG and firstly can I just say (((((hugs))))) :)

    Please don't beat yourself up honey, I think we all go through rough patches. I haven't written a word for 2 days, I know that doesn't sound like much, but it is for me. I have no excuse apart from the fact that I can't be arsed! Lol ;)
    I loved Alice :)

    Good luck honey, you sound like you know what you have to do to sort this out, and I'm sure you will :)


    1. Thanks for the e-hugs!! I often wish I was good at something NOT creative -- the writing process is brutal and maddening when you're having and off day or an off year. Then I hear from people like you and I remember it's the same for everyone and that anything worthwhile is painful sometimes. Thank you for reading :)

  3. Your kids are really providing you with the best material! You should continue to write all of these wonderful things down before you forget. In these relaxed moments, good things will start to evolve. Julie

    1. It's so true what you say. Children are often the best source of inspiration. They see the world the way we remember it from our own childhoods, and they remind us that it's OK to be silly -- that we're not supposed to outgrow everything. Thank you for reading.

  4. If it didn't matter then, it shouldn't matter now - just write!
    Thanks for participating in the IWSG.

    1. Damn straight!! Thanks for reading :)


Post a Comment

I showed you mine -- it's your turn now.

Popular posts from this blog

Writers get laid

Writers get laid -- or they would if they tried -- because people -- especially women -- are impressed by the phrase, "I'm a writer." It's romantic.

Introducing yourself as a writer insinuates substance and depth of character; people like that. They don't know why, except that one-dimensional characters on T.V. sitcoms and big-screen romantic comedies prattle on and on about the whole package -- a good looking, funny, intelligent single with rock-solid values and money.

People admire the skill and dedication it takes to be a novelist or a journalist or a screen writer  -- "I always wanted to be a writer," they tell you with stars in their eyes.

Whether they know it's a myth or not they imagine us in rich, thrilling lives with sports cars and beach houses and Louboutin shoes like Carrie Bradshaw. So the woman at the grocery store doesn't feel bad when she puts back the US Weekly she read cover to cover before she checks out.

Or downloading unauth…

The mirror

Ashlyn discovered the funny mirror at the park today. I could tell you all a long, silly story about our adventure -- the chasing after crows, the falling (me not Ashlyn), the rc plane crash, the dog poop and the climb to the tippy-top-top of the play structure -- but the pictures in this case are funnier.